Trapped in Korea: Episode Two

Today I found the key to the perfect Air Force career. Sad to say but, the answer is a magic eight ball. I will give pause to let that sink in then, explain. I picked up a package today from the post office. It was a care package from my parents, thank you Mom and Dad. The contents of the package was listed as "toy and, candy". Immediately my curiosity was peaked. Trying my hardest not to do any real work in the day, since I am now on day shift again. Also, it really bothers a particular sergeant when I spend the day in-front of a computer instead of in-front of the test station computer. Its my way of punishing him for giving me so much additional work and, making me work with a certain individual. Anyways, getting this thought back on track, there was a toy in the care package from my parents. So upon returning to work after lunch I opened said package to find a plethora of candy and, a tiny magic eight ball. A coworker and I played with it briefly, asking questions about the upcoming inspection and, the possibility of passing it. Amused for a few minutes we returned to work, him to his test station and I to my desk. I placed the magic eight ball in-front for my monitor and continued with my work.
Soon there after, the sergeant I enjoy torturing by doing desk work came out of his office and ask "are you going to do any work today?" With out missing the opportunity and, wanting to show off my new toy, I reached for the magic eight ball and turned it over. The answer it gave was simple. So, with a smile, I read the answer out loud. It read "doubt it". The sergeant just looked stunned, turned, and walked back into his office.
Some might say that this one situation was simply a coincidence. However, these kind of things continued the rest of the day. We had a small exercise today. In the set-up for the exercise our instructions said to consider certain things. So we asked the magic eight ball for an answer. Ten minutes later we were informed that we had to set-up a certain way. That just so happened to be the way the magic eight ball said to set things up. Not convincing enough? While working my additional duties I started getting asked all about programs that I am not a part of. Without looking up a single reference, answer after answer came only from the eight ball. Every answer later verified to be true, so I continued. When asked about programs I was on, I answered from the eight ball, not a reference. Every answer proven true later on. For the record: this is actually how I spent my afternoon. When I was asked how late I was staying today the eight ball provided my answer, "No".
At this point I am convinced of two things. The first, being that if I were to stay in the Air Force I would never be without a magic eight ball again. The second, is that I am pretty sure the people who established, as well as those currently running the Air Force use a magic eight ball to do it.